How to get your Daddy up (by RB)

Daddies don’t like getting up, especially when they have been partying until the wee hours. It is important to help them get up so they can give you breakfast and play with you. Use these tried-and-tested methods for guaranteed success:

  1. Grab his face. Any part of the face will do, but eyes are especially effective.
  2. Suck your thumb and then put it in his ear. Wiggle it round lots if you can.
  3. Dribble a bit on his head. If that doesn’t work, just go ahead and lick it.
  4. Break wind on his pillow. Repeatedly.
  5. If none of this works, resort to high-pitched squealing and pulling out chunks of beard.

Repeat these steps with increasing enthusiasm until your Daddy at least opens one eye.  Well done! He has seen you! Launch yourself onto his face with a belly-flop – he will pick you up for sure, Daddy loves you! Now it’s time to play!


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