There are not seven deadly sins, there are eight. Mummy is guilty of the eighth deadly sin* and now she is paying the price for it. That is karma.
Smugness is the eighth deadly sin.
“Oh the sleepless nights are so hard!” would say Mummy’s friends.
“Oh really?” would say Mummy, “I would not know, for my perfect baby sleeps all night. Because she is perfect. And she is mine, so I made her perfect. She sleeps and sleeps and does not wake. How perfect is my baby?”
Little did Mummy know of the short-lived phase that is the sleepy newborn, and the subsequent phase that is The Four Month Sleep Regression.
“Ah, ’tis but a phase,” thought Mummy optimistically at 3:00am, as she Googled how to overcome this little blip in the perfect one’s perfect sleeping habits. But Mummy was horrified by what Google returned:
Mummy is very, very sorry for her smugness, but it is too late and the karma has come.
Mummy is very, very tired. Mummy is tired because she only sleeps for an hour at a time. Rebel Baby also only sleeps for an hour at a time, but Rebel Baby is not tired. Not at all. Rebel Baby wants to play. With Mummy. And if Mummy doesn’t play, Rebel Baby makes her new favourite noise until Mummy comes to play. It is the same noise The Hulk makes when he transforms…
“RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” shouts Rebel Baby with deep-throated gusto at 1:00am. And 2:00am. And 3:00am. And then she laughs, for she thinks this new noise is hilarious.
Oh yes, Mummy is very, very sorry.
*Mummy is also guilty of the other seven deadly sins, but that is neither here nor there.